This Just In: Groupies Are Still Idiots

This just in from Livenews.com in Australia. Apparently, groupies with aspiring music careers are still falling for the same old lines that the Rolling Stones used on their moms and that Benny Goodman probably used on their grandmothers. Kate Costello, of Melbourne Australia has just come clean with her tale of drugs sex and adult contemporary rock and roll. That’s right, Poor Kate fell under the spell of none other than pseudo rocker, James Blunt.

She met him at a concert last year. that’s when: Blunt, 34, allegedly spun a whole galaxy of bollocks to the pretty young blonde, including promises to help boost her singing career – a simple yet effective trick which has been used by rockers to manipulate the pants of pretty young women since the Cro-Magnon era.

He also wooed her with classy text messages like: “I can’t wait to have your naked body lying next to mine.”

According to Costello, there was talks of production deals and even promises of having her perform on his next new album…. Our guess here is that she would have probably have been playing the organ or possibly the flute.

That was when the drugs came into play. “There were so many drugs. There was this silver platter of drugs, every drug you could think of: cocaine, MDMA, K (ketamine, a tranquiliser used on horses), hash,” she told reporters.

So why has this jilted fan’s walk of shame become so public?
“I just want people to know exactly what type of person he is, I don’t think it’s right people are going and buying his CDs and they think they can relate to him . . . but really, everything he says in his songs is bullshit.”

Blunt was seen denying the entire affair before snickering and giving high fives to everyone in his posse.