Unfortunately for Fidel Gonzalez Gutierrez, a 58 year old man from the Florida Keys, the snow he was trying to sell wasn’t so much the kind you sled on as it was the kind that you snort. When cops caught up the the St. Nick lookalike, they arrested him on six outstanding warrants related to the sale of cocaine. Included in those warrants were “six counts of selling cocaine within 1,000 feet of a place of worship and four counts of using a two-way communication device to facilitate a felony.”
It seems that Guitierrez earned his spot on Monroe County Sheriff’s office’s naughty list when he sold cocaine to an undercover cop on six different occasions in the last month. Personally, this begs the question of exactly how many times do you have to sell coke to a police officer before they arrest you?
In what is clearly a lie, the jail website lists Gutierrez’s occupation as fisherman, but we all know his real job.