The Grammy’s were held last night and I’m officially getting old. A lot of the music that took home a phonograph was won by people who probably have never heard of a phonograph.

Meanwhile, Coldplay won a bunch of awards for ripping off Joe Satriani, Daft Punk beat out Madonna for an award, and Ministry won a grammy for their industrial cover of the Rolling Stones “Under My Thumb.”

Now get off my lawn and check out who else won last night.

ALBUM OF THE YEAR

“Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends”
Coldplay

“Tha Carter III”
Lil Wayne

“Year Of The Gentleman”
Ne-Yo

WINNER: “Raising Sand”
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

“In Rainbows”
Radiohead

BEST FEMALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE

WINNER: “Chasing Pavements”
Adele
Track from: 19

“Love Song”
Sara Bareilles
Track from: Little Voice

“Mercy”
Duffy
Track from: Rockferry

“Bleeding Love”
Leona Lewis

“I Kissed A Girl”
Katy Perry
Track from: One Of The Boys

“So What”
Pink

BEST MALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE
“All Summer Long”
Kid Rock
Track from: Rock N Roll Jesus

WINNER: “Say”
John Mayer
Track from: Continuum

“That Was Me”
Paul McCartney
Track from: Amoeba’s Secret

“I’m Yours”
Jason Mraz
Track from: We Sing. We Dance. We Steal Things.

“Closer”
Ne-Yo
Track from: Year Of The Gentleman

“Wichita Lineman”
James Taylor
Track from: Covers

RECORD OF THE YEAR

“Chasing Pavements”
Adele

“Viva La Vida”
Coldplay

“Bleeding Love”
Leona Lewis

“Paper Planes”
M.I.A

WINNER: “Please Read The Letter”
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

BEST NEW ARTIST
WINNER: Adele
Duffy
The Jonas Brothers
Lady Antebellum
Jazmin Sullivan

BEST ROCK ALBUM
WINNER: “Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends”
Coldplay

“Rock N Roll Jesus”
Kid Rock

“Only By The Night”
Kings Of Leon

“Death Magnetic”
Metallica

“Consolers Of The Lonely”
The Raconteurs

BEST SOLO ROCK VOCAL PERFORMANCE

WINNER: “Gravity”
John Mayer
Track from: Where The Light IsLive In Los Angeles

“I Saw Her Standing There”
Paul McCartney
Track from: Amoeba’s Secret

“Girls In Their Summer Clothes”
Bruce Springsteen
Track from: Magic

“Rise”
Eddie Vedder

“No Hidden Path”
Neil Young
Track from: Chrome Dreams II

BEST ROCK PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS

“Rock N Roll Train”
AC/DC

“Violet Hill”
Coldplay

Long Road Out Of Eden”
Eagles

WINNER: “Sex On Fire”
Kings Of Leon

“House Of Cards”
Radiohead

BEST ROCK SONG
WINNER: “Girls In Their Summer Clothes”
Bruce Springsteen, songwriter (Bruce Springsteen)

“House Of Cards”
Colin Greenwood, Jonny Greenwood, Ed O’Brien, Philip Selway & Thom Yorke,
songwriters (Radiohead)

“I Will Possess Your Heart”
Benjamin Gibbard, Nicholas Harmer, Jason McGerr & Christopher Walla, songwriters
(Death Cab For Cutie)

“Sex On Fire”
Caleb Followill, Jared Followill, Matthew Followill & Nathan Followill,
songwriters (Kings Of Leon)

“Violet Hill”
Guy Berryman, Jonny Buckland, Will Champion & Chris Martin, songwriters
(Coldplay)

BEST HARD ROCK PERFORMANCE
“Inside The Fire”
Disturbed

“Visions”
Judas Priest

WINNER: “Wax Simulacra”
The Mars Volta

“Saints Of Los Angeles”
Mötley Crüe

“Lords Of Salem”
Rob Zombie

BEST METAL PERFORMANCE
“Heroes Of Our Time”
DragonForce

“Nostradamus”
Judas Priest

WINNER: “My Apocalypse”
Metallica
Track from: Death Magnetic

“Under My Thumb”
Ministry
Track from: Cover Up

“Psychosocial”
Slipknot

BEST ROCK INSTRUMENTAL PERFORMANCE
“Castellorizon”
David Gilmour
Track from: Live In Gdansk

“Suicide & Redemption”
Metallica
Track from: Death Magnetic

“34 Ghosts I-IV”
Nine Inch Nails
Track from: Ghosts I-IV

“Hope (Live For The Art Of Peace)”
Rush
Track from: Songs For Tibet: The Art Of Peace

WINNER: “Peaches En Regalia”
Zappa Plays Zappa

BEST ALTERNATIVE MUSIC ALBUM
“Modern Guilt”
Beck

“Narrow Stairs”
Death Cab For Cutie

“The Odd Couple”
Gnarls Barkley

“Evil Urges”
My Morning Jacket

WINNER: “In Rainbows”
Radiohead

BEST POP COLLABORATION WITH VOCALS

“Lesson Learned”
Alicia Keys & John Mayer
Track from: As I Am

“4 Minutes”
Madonna, Justin Timberlake & Timbaland
Track from: Hard Candy

WINNER: “Rich Woman”
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss
Track from: Raising Sand

“If I Never See Your Face Again”
Rihanna & Maroon 5
Track from: Good Girl Gone Bad: Reloaded

“No Air”
Jordin Sparks & Chris Brown
Track from: Jordin Sparks

SONG OF THE YEAR
“American Boy”
(Estelle Featuring Kanye West)

“Chasing Pavements”
(Adele)

“I’m Yours”
(Jason Mraz)

“Love Song”
(Sara Bareilles)

WINNER: “Viva La Vida”
(Coldplay)

BEST FEMALE COUNTRY VOCAL PERFORMANCE
“For These Times”
Martina McBride

“What I Cannot Change”
LeAnn Rimes

WINNER: “Last Name”
Carrie Underwood

“Last Call”
Lee Ann Womack

“This Is Me You’re Talking To”
Trisha Yearwood

BEST MALE COUNTRY VOCAL PERFORMANCE
“You’re Gonna Miss This”
Trace Adkins

“In Color”
Jamey Johnson

“Just Got Started Lovin’ You”
James Otto

WINNER: “Letter To Me”
Brad Paisley

“Troubadour”
George Strait

BEST COUNTRY PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS
“God Must Be Busy”
Brooks & Dunn

“Love Don’t Live Here”
Lady Antebellum

“Every Day”
Rascal Flatts

“Blue Side Of The Mountain”
The SteelDrivers

WINNER: “Stay”
Sugarland

BEST COUNTRY COLLABORATION WITH VOCALS
“Shiftwork”
Kenny Chesney & George Strait

WINNER: “Killing The Blues”
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

“House Of Cash”
George Strait & Patty Loveless

“Life In A Northern Town”
Sugarland, Jake Owen & Little Big Town

“Let The Wind Chase You”
Trisha Yearwood & Keith Urban

BEST COUNTRY INSTRUMENTAL PERFORMANCE
“Sumatra”
Cherryholmes

“Two Small Cars In Rome”
Jerry Douglas & Lloyd Green

“Sleigh Ride”
Béla Fleck & The Flecktones

“Is This America? (Katrina 2005)”
Charlie Haden, Pat Metheny, Jerry Douglas & Bruce Hornsby

WINNER: “Cluster Pluck”
Brad Paisley, James Burton, Vince Gill, John Jorgenson, Albert Lee, Brent Mason,

BEST POP VOCAL ALBUM
“Detours”
Sheryl Crow

WINNER: “Rockferry”
Duffy

“Long Road Out Of Eden”
Eagles

“Spirit”
Leona Lewis

“Covers”
James Taylor

BEST TRADITIONAL POP VOCAL ALBUM
WINNER: “Still Unforgettable”
Natalie Cole

“The Sinatra Project”
Michael Feinstein

“Noël”
Josh Groban

“In The Swing Of Christmas”
Barry Manilow

“Rufus Does Judy At Carnegie Hall”
Rufus Wainwright

BEST POP INSTRUMENTAL PERFORMANCE
“Love Appetite”
Steve Cropper & Felix Cavaliere

WINNER: “I Dreamed There Was No War”
Eagles

“Fortune Teller”
Fourplay

“Steppin’ Out”
Stanley Jordan

“Blast!”
Marcus Miller

BEST POP INSTRUMENTAL ALBUM
“Sax For Stax”
Gerald Albright

“Greatest Hits Rerecorded Volume One”
Larry Carlton

WINNER: “Jingle All The Way”
Béla Fleck & The Flecktones

“The Spice Of Life”
Earl Klugh

“A Night Before Christmas”
Spyro Gyra
[Heads Up International]

BEST DANCE RECORDING

WINNER: “Harder Better Faster Stronger”
Daft Punk

“Ready For The Floor”
Hot Chip

“Just Dance”
Lady Gaga & Colby O’Donis

“Give It 2 Me”
Madonna

“Disturbia”
Rihanna

“Black & Gold”
Sam Sparro

BEST ELECTRONIC/DANCE ALBUM
“New York City”
Brazilian Girls

WINNER: “Alive 2007”
Daft Punk

“Bring Ya To The Brink”
Cyndi Lauper

“X”
Kylie Minogue

“Last Night”
Moby

“Robyn”
Robyn

BEST FEMALE R&B VOCAL PERFORMANCE

“Me, Myself And I”
Beyoncé

“Heaven Sent”
Keyshia Cole

“Spotlight”
Jennifer Hudson

WINNER: “Superwoman”
Alicia Keys

“Need U Bad”
Jazmine Sullivan

BEST MALE R&B VOCAL PERFORMANCE

“You’re The Only One”
Eric Benét

“Take You Down”
Chris Brown

WINNER: “Miss Independent”
Ne-Yo

“Can’t Help But Wait”
Trey Songz

“Here I Stand”
Usher

BEST R&B PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS
“Ribbon In The Sky”
Boyz II Men

“Words”
Anthony David Featuring India.Arie

“Stay With Me (By The Sea)”
Al Green Featuring John Legend

“I’m His Only Woman”
Jennifer Hudson Featuring Fantasia

“Never Give You Up”
Raphael Saadiq Featuring Stevie Wonder & CJ Hilton

BEST TRADITIONAL R&B VOCAL PERFORMANCE
“A Change Is Gonna Come”
Wayne Brady

WINNER: “You’ve Got The Love I Need”
Al Green Featuring Anthony Hamilton

“Baby I Know”
(Linda Jones) With Helen Bruner & Terry Jones

“Love That Girl”
Raphael Saadiq

“In Love With Another Man”
Jazmine Sullivan

BEST URBAN/ALTERNATIVE PERFORMANCE
“Say Goodbye To Love”
Kenna

“Wanna Be”
Maiysha

WINNER: “Be OK”
Chrisette Michele Featuring will.i.am

“Many Moons”
Janelle Monae

“Lovin You (Music)”
Wayna Featuring Kokayi

BEST R&B SONG
“Bust Your Windows”
(Jazmine Sullivan)

“Customer”
(Raheem DeVaughn)

“Heaven Sent”
(Keyshia Cole)

WINNER: “Miss Independent”
(Ne-Yo)

(Jennifer Hudson)

BEST R&B ALBUM
“Love & Life”
Eric Benét

“Motown: A Journey Through Hitsville USA”
Boyz II Men

“Lay It Down”
Al Green

“Jennifer Hudson”
Jennifer Hudson

“The Way I See It”
Raphael Saadiq
[Columbia]

BEST CONTEMPORARY R&B ALBUM
WINNER: “Growing Pains”
Mary J. Blige

“Back Of My Lac'”
J. Holiday

“First Love”
Karina

“Year Of The Gentleman”
Ne-Yo

“Fearless”
Jazmine Sullivan

BEST RAP ALBUM
“American Gangster”
Jay-Z

WINNER:”Tha Carter III”
Lil Wayne

“The Cool”
Lupe Fiasco

“Nas”
Nas

“Paper Trail”
T.I.

BEST RAP SOLO PERFORMANCE
“Roc Boys (And The Winner Is)…”
Jay-Z

WINNER: “A Milli”
Lil Wayne

“Paris, Tokyo”
Lupe Fiasco

“N.i.*.*.e.r. (The Slave And The Master)”
Nas

“Sexual Eruption”
Snoop Dogg

BEST RAP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP
“Royal Flush”
Big Boi Featuring Raekwon And Andre 3000

WINNER: “Swagga Like Us”
Jay-Z & T.I. Featuring Kanye West & Lil Wayne

“Mr. Carter”
Lil Wayne Featuring Jay-Z

“Wish You Would”
Ludacris Featuring T.I.

“Put On”
Young Jeezy Featuring Kanye West

BEST RAP/SUNG COLLABORATION
WINNER: “American Boy”
Estelle Featuring Kanye West

“Low”
Flo Rida Featuring T-Pain

“Green Light”
John Legend & Andre 3000

“Got Money”
Lil Wayne Featuring T-Pain

“Superstar”
Lupe Fiasco Featuring Matthew Santos

BEST RAP SONG
WINNER: “Lollipop”
(Lil Wayne Featuring Static Major)

“Low”
(Flo Rida Featuring T-Pain)

“Sexual Eruption”
(Snoop Dogg)

“Superstar”
(Lupe Fiasco Featuring Matthew Santos)

“Swagga Like Us”
t, songwriters (M.
(Jay-Z & T.I. Featuring Kanye West & Lil Wayne)

BEST COUNTRY SONG
“Dig Two Graves”
(Randy Travis)

“I Saw God Today”
(George Strait)

“In Color”
(Jamey Johnson)

WINNER: “Stay”
(Sugarland)

“You’re Gonna Miss This”
(Trace Adkins)

BEST COUNTRY ALBUM
“That Lonesome Song”
Jamey Johnson

“Sleepless Nights”
Patty Loveless

WINNER: “Troubadour”
George Strait

“Around The Bend”
Randy Travis

“Heaven, Heartache And The Power Of Love”
Trisha Yearwood

BEST BLUEGRASS ALBUM
“Cherryholmes III: Don’t Believe”
Cherryholmes

“Del McCoury Band – Live At The 2008 New Orleans Jazz & Heritage Festival”
Del McCoury Band

“The Ultimate Collection / Live At The Ryman”
Earl Scruggs With Family & Friends

WINNER: “Honoring The Fathers Of Bluegrass: Tribute To 1946 And 1947”
Ricky Skaggs & Kentucky Thunder

“Wheels”
Dan Tyminski

BEST NEW AGE ALBUM

“Meditations”
William Ackerman

“Pathfinder”
Will Clipman

“Peace Time”
Jack DeJohnette

“Ambrosia”
Peter Kater

“The Scent Of Light”
Ottmar Liebert & Luna Negra

BEST CONTEMPORARY JAZZ ALBUM
WINNER: “Randy In Brasil”
Randy Brecker

“Floating Point”
John McLaughlin

“Cannon Re-Loaded: All-Star Celebration Of Cannonball Adderley
(Various Artists)”

“Miles From India”
(Various Artists)

“Lifecycle”
Yellowjackets Featuring Mike Stern

BEST JAZZ VOCAL ALBUM
“Imagina: Songs Of Brasil”
Karrin Allyson

“Breakfast On The Morning Tram
Stacey Kent”

“If Less Is More…Nothing Is Everything”
Kate McGarry

WINNER: “Loverly”
Cassandra Wilson

“Distances”
Norma Winstone (Glauco Venier & Klaus Gesing)

BEST JAZZ INSTRUMENTAL SOLO
WINNER: “Be-Bop”
Terence Blanchard, soloist

“Seven Steps To Heaven”
Till Brönner, soloist

“Waltz For Debby”
Gary Burton & Chick Corea, soloists

“Son Of Thirteen”
Pat Metheny, soloist

“Be-Bop”
James Moody, soloist

BEST JAZZ INSTRUMENTAL ALBUM, INDIVIDUAL OR GROUP
WINNER: “The New Crystal Silence”
Chick Corea & Gary Burton

“History, Mystery”
Bill Frisell

“Brad Mehldau Trio: Live”
Brad Mehldau Trio

“Day Trip”
Pat Metheny With Christian McBride & Antonio Sanchez

“Standards”
Alan Pasqua, Dave Carpenter & Peter Erskine Trio

BEST LARGE JAZZ ENSEMBLE ALBUM
“Appearing Nightly”
Carla Bley And Her Remarkable Big Band

“Act Your Age”
Gordon Goodwin’s Big Phat Band

“Symphonica”
Joe Lovano With WDR Big Band & Rundfunk Orchestra

“Blauklang”
Vince Mendoza

WINNER: “Monday Night Live At The Village Vanguard”
The Vanguard Jazz Orchestra

BEST LATIN JAZZ ALBUM
“Afro Bop Alliance”
Caribbean Jazz Project

“The Latin Side Of Wayne Shorter”
Conrad Herwig & The Latin Side Band

WINNER: “Song For Chico”
Arturo O’Farrill & The Afro-Latin Jazz Orchestra

“Nouveau Latino”
Nestor Torres

“Marooned/Aislado”
Papo Vázquez The Mighty Pirates

BEST TRADITIONAL BLUES ALBUM
“The Blues Rolls On”
Elvin Bishop

“Skin Deep”
Buddy Guy

“All Odds Against Me”
John Lee Hooker Jr.

“One Kind Favor”
B.B. King

“Pinetop Perkins & Friends”
Pinetop Perkins & Friends

BEST CONTEMPORARY BLUES ALBUM
“Peace, Love & BBQ”
Marcia Ball

“Like A Fire”
Solomon Burke

“City That Care Forgot”
Dr. John And The Lower 911

“Maestro”
Taj Mahal

“Simply Grand”
Irma Thomas

BEST TRADITIONAL FOLK ALBUM
“Coal”
Kathy Mattea

“Comedians & Angels”
Tom Paxton

“Bring Me Home”
Peggy Seeger

WINNER: “At 89”
Pete Seeger

“Strangers In Another Country”
Rosalie Sorrels

BEST CONTEMPORARY FOLK/AMERICANA ALBUM
“Day After Tomorrow”
Joan Baez

“I, Flathead”
Ry Cooder

“Sex & Gasoline”
Rodney Crowell

“All I Intended To Be”
Emmylou Harris

WINNER: “Raising Sand”
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss

BEST REGGAE ALBUM
“Jah Is Real”
Burning Spear

“Let’s Get Physical”
Elephant Man

“Vibes”
Heavy D

“Repentance”
Lee “Scratch” Perry

“Intoxication”
Shaggy

“Amazing”
Sly & Robbie

BEST POLKA ALBUM
“El Maestro Del Acordeón Y Sus Polkas”
Paulino Bernal

“Speechless”
LynnMarie & Charlie Kelley As The Boxhounds

“Back To Back Hall Of Fame Polkas”
Walter Ostanek & His Band, Jerry Darlak & The Touch And Bob Kravos & His Band

“Hungry For More”
Polka Family Band

“Let The Whole World Sing”
Jimmy Sturr And His Orchestra

BEST MUSICAL ALBUM FOR CHILDREN
“Beethoven’s Wig 4: Dance Along Symphonies”
Beethoven’s Wig

“Big Round World”
Trout Fishing In America

WINNER: “Here Come The 123s”
They Might Be Giants

“Here Comes Brady Rymer And The Little Band That Could”
Brady Rymer And The Little Band That Could

“The Shoe Bird”
Gerard Schwarz Conducting The Seattle Symphony

BEST COMEDY ALBUM
“Anticipation”
Lewis Black

“Flight Of The Conchords”
Flight Of The Conchords

“For Your Consideration”
Kathy Griffin

WINNER: “It’s Bad For Ya”
George Carlin

“Songs Of The Bushmen”
Harry Shearer

BEST COMPILATION SOUNDTRACK ALBUM FOR MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA
“American Gangster”

“August Rush”

“Juno”

“Mamma Mia!”

“Sweeney Todd – The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street”

BEST SCORE SOUNDTRACK ALBUM FOR MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA
“The Dark Knight”

“Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull”

“Iron Man”

“There Will Be Blood”

“Wall-E”

BEST SONG WRITTEN FOR MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA
“Down To Earth” (From Wall-E)

“Ever Ever After” (From Enchanted)

“Say” (From The Bucket List)

“That’s How You Know” (From Enchanted)

“Walk Hard” (From Walk Hard – The Dewey Cox Story)

BEST SHORT FORM MUSIC VIDEO
“Honey”
Erykah Badu

“Who’s Gonna Save My Soul”
Gnarls Barkley

“Another Way To Die”
Alicia Keys & Jack White

“House Of Cards”
Radiohead

WINNER:”Pork And Beans”
Weezer

BEST LONG FORM MUSIC VIDEO
“Where The Light Is – Live In Los Angeles”
John Mayer

WINNER:”Runnin’ Down A Dream”
Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers

“Good Girl Gone Bad Live”
Rihanna

“Respect Yourself – The Stax Records Story”
(Various Artists)

“Amazing Journey: The Story Of The Who”
The Who