Schmoyoho, the people behind Auto Tune The News are back with their recap of last night’s presidential debate. For 90 minutes we saw what might be the closest we’ll ever get to two candidates getting in a fist fight on national TV… Had they only just sung together like in this video, Obama and Romney could have ended the evening with a hug and a couple of those White House brewed beers.
This was way more entertaining than actually sitting through 90 minutes of whatever last night was supposed to be.
LYRICS
Crowley
Welcome to the town hall debate
where ordinary people talk to the candidates
Skippy
The ladies tell me they like a man with insurance
So how do I get some without paying a billion dollars for it
Tell me, who’s gonna work it out, baby
Who’s gonna work it out?
Obama
This is not just a health issue
It’s an economic issue
This is money out of that family’s pocket
Romney
If Obamacare is implemented fully
It’ll be another 2500 on top
You’ve seen health insurance premiums, gone up
Incomes go down
Obama
I said that we would make sure that insurance companies
Can’t jerk you around
CHORUS:
Skippy
What you gonna do?
Romney
We should make sure that our legal system works
Crowley
Oh, what you gonna do?
Obama
Go after gang bangers
we’re gonna get it done
In a second term
Skippy
Oh, what you gonna do?
Obama
Take the money we’ve been spending on war
Romney
More drilling
Obama
Double our exports
Skippy
Who’s gonna work it out, baby, who’s gonna work it out?
Chad
Since I got out of college, I’ve been living in my mom’s basement
How are you gonna get me a job before she goes totally apestuff?
Who’s gonna work it out, baby
Who’s gonna work it out?
Romney
I want you to be able to get a job
I know what it takes
To make America the most attractive place
That’s why I wanna bring down the tax rates
Obama
Low-skill jobs are not gonna come back
I want jobs with a high wage
If we’re adding to our deficits for tax cuts
We will lose that race
Cynthia
Just because I am a lady
My salary’s a little bit less
How can every woman get equal pay?
And please stop looking at my breasts
Romney
I had the chance to pull together a cabinet
I brought us binders full of women
My chief of staff said
“I need to be making dinner for my kids”
So we said fine
Obama
My grandmother worked her way up to become
Vice president of a local bank, but she hit the glass ceiling
Now I’ve got two daughters and I wanna make the same opportunities
That anybody’s sons have
[CHORUS]
Obama: From the governor, we haven’t heard any specifics beyond Big Bird
Romney: That’s completely false
Obama: Not true
Romney: Absolutely true
Obama: Just isn’t true
Crowley: Wooo