Florida Man Arrested For Having Sex With Alligator – Crikey!

Rupert Darwin is in a heap of trouble. The 59 year old Collier County Florida (Of Course) man has been arrested for having sex with an alligator. According to reports, he not only had sex with it once, but he kept the 12 foot beast bound and blindfolded for a month, sexually assaulting it several times a day.

Not surprisingly, residents of his 400 person town consider him to be a little odd.

How did he get caught? Well, it seems he got caught with his hand in the gator jar… A hiker was walking by his home and was caught off guard when he noticed Darwin going to gator town in his back yard.

He reported to to police that he heard Darwin say: “Next time you try to kill a man, you best get the job done. Now you’re my bitch forever.”

He went on to tell them: “It was the damn strangest thing I’ve ever seen. The gator didn’t even move. It was like it didn’t give a s**t that man was having sex with it.”

Sheriffs arrested Darwin on multiple counts of animal cruelty and one count of illegally keeping a wild animal.

Here is an excerpt from Darwin’s police statement:

The gator tried to eat me and this was revenge, pure and simple. I don’t have no sexual attraction to gators, but I wanted to teach this bitch a lesson. I could have just killed her, but that would have been too easy. She was getting what she deserved.

Darwin also told police he had planned to chop off the alligator’s tail and pull her teeth as part of his revenge scheme and had even considered performing noise torture on the reptile by playing what Darwin described as “nigger music” over and over.

Darwin claimed the alligator had gotten a hold of his pant leg when he was fishing in a swamp and tried to drag him into the water. Darwin was able to escape without injury, but that had set his resolve to get revenge.

As for the gator, it’s being treated for what are considered to be minor injuries and will be released back into the wild shortly.

Source: Thugviral