61-year-old Joanne Accetturo was arrested this week after walking up to her boyfriend and slapping him in the face. Then, she threw a squid at him, before grabbing his wallet, throwing it, and escaping in a four-door Buick Lesabre. Witnesses at the scene say that Accetturo also attempted to hit him several times with one of the chairs that was outside the Einstein Bros. Bagels.
Joanne was arrested and charged, but has since been released under supervision. At this point, there’s not a single report in the story in which anyone can explain where the squid came from.