I wanted to get this post up an hour ago, but I was busy eating a nice big chunk of veal with a side of unicorn hearts. Anyways… earlier today, PETA (People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals) took one more giant leap towards complete cultural irrelevance with their latest campaign. The campaign targets the Super Mario Franchise for Mario’s use of the Tanooki suit.
They chose now because Super Mario 3D Land will be coming out soon for the 3DS. We are very impressed with the quick action that the animal rights group has taken. The Tanooki suit has been a staple in Mario Bros games since SMB3 came out… in 1990! So, good on you , Peta, it only took you 21 years to formulate an idea.
So, why all the hubub? PETA claims that Mario is essentially telling kids that it is OK to wear fur, and this is bad, mmmkay? It is amazing that they haven’t gone after Elmo and Grover yet. they wear fur every day.
They are also trying to make the point that real life Tanuki, or raccoon dogs are skinned alive, which is horrible, but the logic behind the campaign just makes PETA dumb.
The highlight of the campaign is a really, really, really lame flash game in which a skinned Tanooki must chase down Mario through a bloody Super Mario game environment.
We will absolutely concede that skinning anyone or anything alive is bad mojo and is probably something that you’ll eventually get karmic retribution for. However, to say that Mario Bros makes people want to wear fur is like saying that ’30 Minutes or Less’ makes people want to have a bomb strapped to their chest. In other words… STUPID
If you want to play a crappy game and watch a horrific video of animals getting slaughtered, click here. Me, I’m going to go have a burger.
Animals. They taste delicious.