Categories: WTF

Suckiest Gas Station Sex Story You’ll Hear All Day

There’s a moment in every man’s life that women just don’t understand. We’re standing there… at the car wash… casually vacuuming the floor mats in our cars when an urge over takes us. Maybe its the gasoline wafting through the air. Perhaps its the roar of the giant dirt-sucking hose in our hands. Whatever it is, our inner Barry White takes over and we just can’t think of anything but making sweet, sweet love to that gas station vacuum.

At least that’s was the excuse a man probably used when he was arrested for “receiving sexual favors from a vacuum” at a car wash in Thomas Township, Michigan.

Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act.

Personally, I don’t know what the hell this man was thinking. I’ve got a strict rule about putting my junk anywhere near something that could rip it off. Was he watching too much Anime? What’s he going to tell the other guys in Lock up? Did they clean off the Vacuum before the next person used it? So many questions…

Hoob

Recent Posts

‘Transformers One’ – First Trailer For Animated Origin Flick

TRANSFORMERS ONE is the untold origin story of Optimus Prime and Megatron, better known as…

1 week ago

Glen Powell Starring In Edgar Wright’s ‘The Running Man’ Reimagining At Paramount

This has jumped onto the list of most anticipated films!

2 weeks ago

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – The Last Ronin Getting Live-Action R-Rated Film

Will a TMNT film that only focuses on one turtle work on the big screen?

2 weeks ago

GI-Joe/ Transformers Film Now Officially in Development

This is the dream of any kid who grew up in the 80s and 90s.

2 weeks ago

Joker: Folie à Deux Official Teaser Trailer

He's not alone anymore. Joker: Folie à Deux – only in theaters and @IMAX, October…

3 weeks ago